Dealing with difficult customers is part of the job in many customer service and client-facing roles. That disgruntled customer that complains about everything and makes unreasonable demands can ruin your day if you let them get under your skin. While our natural instinct may be to get defensive, argue or shut down, these will often make the situation worse. What the moment calls for is keeping calm, actively listening, expressing empathy and working together to find a mutually acceptable solution.

In this comprehensive guide, we will explore strategies for effectively navigating conflict resolution with customers. You’ll learn how to handle even the most difficult interactions in a professional manner that leaves the customer feeling satisfied—and without leaving you feeling completely drained. Let’s dive in!

Understanding Difficult Customers 

To effectively handle contentious situations with customers, it helps to understand where they are coming from. Here are some of the most common types of difficult customers and what’s driving their behavior:

Common Types of Difficult Customers

The Chronic Complainer This customer finds fault with everything and constantly complains. Minor imperfections send them into a tizzy. They want to speak to a manager at the slightest provocation. 

The Entitled Demander This overbearing customer makes unreasonable demands and has an inflated sense of entitlement. They expect the “customer is always right” motto to be taken to the extreme.

The Passive Aggressive This customer will smile and act polite on the surface, but make subtle, snide comments and use sarcasm to express their dissatisfaction in a passive aggressive way. 

The Aggressive Bully This in-your-face customer raises their voice, uses profanity, insults and belittles. They may use intimidation tactics to get what they want.

The Charming Manipulator This customer uses flattery and charm to manipulate you into giving them special treatment, discounts or exceptions to policies.

The Constant Criticizer This customer does nothing but criticize, judge and point out faults in your business’s products, services, policies and staff at every opportunity.

The Unreasonable Haggler This customer tries to negotiate prices that are completely unreasonable or below cost. They want something for nothing.

The Scam Artist This dishonest customer fabricates complaints or problems in hopes of getting refunds, discounts or free merchandise/services.  

Reasons Behind Difficult Behavior

There are often reasons why customers act out with difficult behavior:

• They are having a bad day unrelated to you
• They have built up frustration from prior negative experiences
• They see customer service staff as punching bags
• They feel a lack of control in their life
• The have entitlement issues
• They have unrealistic expectations of perfection  
• They get a sense of power and satisfaction from bullying others
• They are under high stress and anxiety in their lives

While these reasons don’t excuse bad behavior, recognizing that difficult customers often act out because of internal issues can help you from taking their words and actions too personally. Responding with empathy and understanding rather than anger or defensiveness often leads to more positive conflict resolution.

Conflict Resolution Strategies

Now let’s get into specific strategies you can apply to effectively deal with difficult customers and achieve win-win conflict resolution.

Stay Calm and Avoid Taking Things Personally

No matter how heated the customer gets, it’s vital that you keep your cool and do not retaliate or get drawn into the drama. Take deep breaths. Pause before responding instead of reacting impulsively. Understand that their behavior likely reflects something going on inside them rather than being a personal attack on you. Channel compassion.

Actively Listen to Understand Their Perspective  

Let the dissatisfied customer vent without interrupting them. Make eye contact and give them your complete focus. Reflect their feelings back to them to show you empathize. (“I hear how frustrating this experience has been for you.”) Ask thoughtful follow-up questions to understand their perspective and get to the heart of the issue. Make it clear you are making an effort to see things from their shoes.

Express Empathy and Apologize When Appropriate

Even if the complaint seems unreasonable, validate their feelings and acknowledge their viewpoint. (“I understand why you would feel that way.” “I can see why you would be upset about that.”) If there was a legitimate service failure or mistake on your company’s part, take responsibility and sincerely apologize. (“I apologize for the delay. We clearly dropped the ball and I’m very sorry you had a negative experience working with us.”) Customers often just want to feel heard and understood.

Take Responsibility Where Necessary 

If you or your company made a mistake, own it. Offering excuses or trying to justify the failure often makes customers more upset. (“You’re right, we should have communicated the change in policy better.”) Taking responsibility earns you more respect. Outline what steps you will take to make sure the issue does not happen again.

Offer Solutions and Alternatives

The customer may just want to vent, but if they raise specific problems, offer potential solutions. Present them with a few options whenever possible so they feel a sense of control. Brainstorm compromises and emphasize that you want to collaborate to find a resolution that leaves them satisfied. (“We want you to be happy. Let’s talk about what we can do.”)

Know When to Get a Manager Involved  

If a customer makes an unreasonable demand that you cannot accommodate per company policy, or if they get verbally abusive, do not continue going back and forth. Politely explain there is nothing more you can do, but offer to get a manager involved. Pass the interaction to your manager so you do not end up on the receiving end of more nasty behavior.

Follow Up After the Interaction

After a heated customer interaction, follow up to reinforce that their concerns were heard and addressed. An email summarizing the issue, the solution and expressing appreciation for their patience often smooths things over. Consider including a coupon or discount code as a gesture of goodwill. 

Turning Negatives into Positives

While dealing with difficult customers tests our patience and conflict resolution skills, these experiences also present invaluable opportunities for improvement. Here are some ways to turn negative interactions into fuel for positive change:

Learn from Each Experience 

Treat every difficult encounter as a chance to build your conflict de-escalation and resolution skills. What worked and what didn’t? How could you have phrased things better? Reflect on what you have learned and consider how you would handle it next time.

Develop Thicker Skin Over Time

The more difficult customers you deal with, the more resilient you will become. You will learn not to take angry words personally. The insults and complaints will roll off your back more easily. Your confidence and composure will grow.

Improve Products, Services and Policies  

Look for any valid points within customer complaints. What criticisms point to real problems or shortcomings that your company could improve? Bring customer grievances to management’s attention when appropriate so strengths can be leveraged and weaknesses addressed.

Build Stronger Relationships and Loyalty 

Turn angry, dissatisfied customers into enthusiastic fans. When you demonstrate genuine care, responsiveness and the ability to resolve issues, customers remember that. Your conflict resolution skills help build trust, appreciation and loyalty over time. They will come back because they know you have their back.

Conclusion

Dealing with difficult customers requires resilience, empathy and conflict resolution finesse. While you cannot control a customer’s behavior, you can control how you respond. By staying calm, actively listening, expressing understanding, taking responsibility, offering solutions and learning from each encounter, you can achieve win-win conflict resolution. Handled properly, even the most trying interactions present opportunities to improve, strengthen relationships and demonstrate why customers should keep coming back. With time and practice, you will become adept at diffusing tensions and satisfying even the trickiest customers.